[They're given a lot to chew on after that dinner. It was only natural that they'd have to face the fact that they would have to fight their own allies eventually, but... it's still a tough pill to swallow. That, combined with Team Archer's earnest pleas for them to consider trying to destroy the Holy Grail...
It all means Emiri's head is spinning.
She sighs a bit, shaking her head as they both settle back into their current living space (this time, a house they were taken into as transfer students).]
Everything's, like, super complicated now... and I guess we're gonna have to do a bit more fighting after all.
[Not that that's a surprise, since they're both very committed to seeing this through. But still! Totally not rad at all!]
[ It certainly is a lot... they thought they'd be more prepared for this stage of the competition. Maybe if the last remaining pairs weren't Archer and Rider, it might be less painful. Ryuji and Archer are both kind, straightforward, fair. But Vergil and Rider have helped them survive so many times... they've really looked out for them. There's trust there. A fondness. ]
It's going to be... difficult...
[ They settle in nearby her, seeming to have calmed down a bit for the time being. When it's just the two of them, it's easier for them to keep a clear focus of everything they're fighting for. She matters most of any contestant... that won't ever change, no matter who they have to draw their blade against. ]
Are you afraid....?
[ Over time, they've grown a little more confident in talking with her - not always feeling like they need to ask permission, at least - so while the question comes out meekly, quietly, they ask it without hesitation. ]
[She just hangs her head at that, and nods. There's no reason for her to hide anything from them, after all. They're her precious partner.]
Mmhm... I'm super afraid.
[She fiddles with the end of one of her ponytails, frowning a little at her lap.]
I'm afraid that something's gonna happen to Vergipi and Donutan... I'm afraid that Ryuchu and Archan will suffer... and most of all, I'm afraid of something happening to you...!
[They've made it through so much together, and she has total faith, but...! There are still so many challenges to overcome.]
[ Their expression softens as she says that, feeling a weight lifted off them. As ever... her concern provokes a warm glow out of them. They shake their head once, closing one of their hands into a fist in their lap. ]
Even if I can't win here... the thing I've been most scared of during this war is you getting hurt because of me.
You've been fighting for my wish all this time... and helping me... without a clear wish of your own. You never had to, but you did...
[ It's a selfless kindness that she's shown them. And they won't ever forget that. In a way, they feel a vast debt to her, for the countless times she's gracefully and effortlessly showed them compassion. She's never faltered once, in staying by their side - never doubted them. They've turned almost everyone they know against them somehow — so Emiri's unwavering friendship, all this time, feels all the more monumental. ]
So as long as I can protect you... that's enough. To me. I'll be fine...
[ In other words, if something does happen to them... they won't mind, so long as they're able to keep her from much harm. They have more to say about her fears regarding the other Servants and Masters, but they feel their opinion on this matter is more pressing - deserves more care in its delivery. ]
[Emiri's eyes brim with tears as they speak--not unhappy tears, but perhaps overwhelmed tears. Over and over and over again, Berserker has said that they just want to protect Emiri. That it's their job to protect her. That they're going to look after her.
But this is different. This time... they want to protect her because that's explicitly what they want to do, isn't it?
It's as nice to hear their hopes and dreams as it is overwhelming to know that she's a part of it, just like this.
A tiny sniffle, and she reaches out to rest a hand on their clenched fist.]
I'll be okay! I'm sure of it. I've got you, and I don't think everyone else is really coming after me [two ambushes later this feels untrue], and like... I'm p tough too, ya know?
So I guess if you're gonna worry about me... lemme keep worrying aboutcha until the end. Okay?
[That will make her feel better, just as being protected by Berserker makes her heart feel warm in her chest.]
[ Her hand is always so warm — or maybe it's their hands that are always cold, on account of the strange substance running through their veins. Either way, her touch is always a comfort, and one they're able to respond to more readily, nowadays. Slowly, they open up their palm so that they can clutch at her hand gently, their grip light and tentative. There's a nod, to all she's said - agreeing to letting her worry about them - before they muster up the courage to speak again. ]
It's not because I think you're weak...
[ They'd known from the beginning that Emiri had magical talent — they don't doubt at all that she is, ahem, "p tough." But, this is what they're good at, right? It's what they were made for. Being strong and able to withstand the force of any opponent. At least with her, they can use their power for something good, something they believe in. ]
[... Oh nooooo. Oh no!! That's so sweet! She beams, and as they open their palm for her, she just threads her fingers through theirs to hold their hand all the more warmly.]
That's how I feel too. We're friends! Besties, even!
[She has Decided This.]
You've done so much for me even in such a short time, and like... I'm so, so glad all of this time has been spent with you!
[She wouldn't want to be partners with any of the other Servants--this is what feels right, and this is what's made her so happy, despite everything that's happened in this war.]
[ It's strange — for the first time in a long while, they don't feel so afraid. Right now, the only thing that even remotely matters is the girl in front of them. Their friend. Someone who's happy to be around them, someone who's thought of them and considered them and worried for them. They're happy — more than they'd really be able to explain, after everything. But nonetheless, they smile, less shy and clumsy than before, humming their agreement and nodding along with her words.
They wouldn't want anyone else as their partner, either. ]
Um, earlier, when we were with Rider... it made me think of something. About the time we have left.
[ It's only a matter of time before the war ends, regardless of who the victor is, given their collusion with their allies. And though the words themselves may be ominous, their expression remains uncharacteristically lighter, managing to make eye contact for just a bit longer than normal. ]
[She blinks a little at that, tilting her head to one side. That's... a topic she doesn't like thinking about, even though she knows they're right. Their time together is fleeting. Even if they win every battle they still have to face...
In the end, they can't stay together.
And that's just the way it is.
Emiri isn't a stranger to the fact that sometimes that's how life pans out despite her young age; it isn't anything she's going to fight or rail against. But it does mean her lips pull down into a frown, her shoulders slumping a bit. Still... Berserker must be thinking about something important to bring it up. For once, their expressions are reversed--Berserker's is lighter than normal, even as Emiri can't help but frown.]
[ It's difficult for them, too — the prospect that they'll never see her again. Though, that had been a guarantee in 99% of the outcomes here. Only the survivor would have even a chance at staying on contact... so they tried to not let themself get too attached to the idea. How would they even be able to see each other or talk to each other again? It's probably something only a wish could grant.
But they're not a stranger to not getting their way. Actually, that's pretty much the natural order of things, to them. It's sad, of course, seeing how she wilts, and they wilt a little too, biting the inside of their lip. It takes a second, and they look... well, slightly embarrassed, once they're able to utter the words. ]
...It's Crona. My name...
[ Why tell her now? Before, they'd thought telling her would probably only make her sad, were they to lose in the early stages of the competition. But, now... selfishly, they want to be remembered by her than something other than Berserker, or even the beloved nickname she'd bestowed upon them on the first day. If their days are numbered together no matter what, at least they can feel comforted that she'll live on, knowing who they were. ]
I wanted you to know it. Before, um... the war ends.
She wasn't expecting that at all, and it's clear from the look on her face. She's been curious a few times, of course, but telling people their name was something a Servant might never do, and she could at least understand why.
But this... this is a form of Crona's trust, isn't it?
This is their affection and belief in her in one simple but ever-so-meaningful gesture, and Emiri lights back up like the sun as it sinks in.]
Crona... that's such a nice name!
[And honestly, Emiri nicknames every single person she meets, and it slips out immediately:]
Crororin--
[... But then she shakes her head, expression soft.]
Mm, nah. Crona is perfect. Thank you for telling me... I'm super duper happy right now.
And... I really like your name!
[And she really likes being able to finally use it with them.]
by god i'm going to use this icon once in this game
[ Oh. They didn't think it would be such a change, being called by their real name. But, it almost feels like talking with her for the first time. During this entire war, keeping the title Berserker, or even Beroppi, allowed them to keep a bit of distance between the person they were at home and the person they are here. In a way, it was like putting on a mask. It feels... really nice, to be their true self with her.
The smile that breaks out on their face is warmer and brighter for it — unbidden by the tension that their features are typically wrought by. That they trust her completely is clear — they'd never relax this way around anyone else. ]
Um, I'm... happy, too.
[ And they mean that! Even if the delivery is a little shaky. They're still not very accustomed to talking about their own feelings, awkward as a newborn foal at it. But in this moment, they want to convey their heart to her. ]
[Wishes aside, war aside... it was worth it to come here just for this. Just to meet Crona, just to know they can relax like this around her, just to know that they can smile like this.
She beams at them in response, and they can be certain that their feelings, their heart--it came across to her loud and clear.
She reaches to squeeze their hands again, grinning.]
Aw, look! You've got such a nice smile, Crona! It's, like, lighting up this whole room to the max!
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
early w4, post rider-berserker alliance meeting
It all means Emiri's head is spinning.
She sighs a bit, shaking her head as they both settle back into their current living space (this time, a house they were taken into as transfer students).]
Everything's, like, super complicated now... and I guess we're gonna have to do a bit more fighting after all.
[Not that that's a surprise, since they're both very committed to seeing this through. But still! Totally not rad at all!]
no subject
It's going to be... difficult...
[ They settle in nearby her, seeming to have calmed down a bit for the time being. When it's just the two of them, it's easier for them to keep a clear focus of everything they're fighting for. She matters most of any contestant... that won't ever change, no matter who they have to draw their blade against. ]
Are you afraid....?
[ Over time, they've grown a little more confident in talking with her - not always feeling like they need to ask permission, at least - so while the question comes out meekly, quietly, they ask it without hesitation. ]
no subject
Mmhm... I'm super afraid.
[She fiddles with the end of one of her ponytails, frowning a little at her lap.]
I'm afraid that something's gonna happen to Vergipi and Donutan... I'm afraid that Ryuchu and Archan will suffer... and most of all, I'm afraid of something happening to you...!
[They've made it through so much together, and she has total faith, but...! There are still so many challenges to overcome.]
no subject
Even if I can't win here... the thing I've been most scared of during this war is you getting hurt because of me.
You've been fighting for my wish all this time... and helping me... without a clear wish of your own. You never had to, but you did...
[ It's a selfless kindness that she's shown them. And they won't ever forget that. In a way, they feel a vast debt to her, for the countless times she's gracefully and effortlessly showed them compassion. She's never faltered once, in staying by their side - never doubted them. They've turned almost everyone they know against them somehow — so Emiri's unwavering friendship, all this time, feels all the more monumental. ]
So as long as I can protect you... that's enough. To me. I'll be fine...
[ In other words, if something does happen to them... they won't mind, so long as they're able to keep her from much harm. They have more to say about her fears regarding the other Servants and Masters, but they feel their opinion on this matter is more pressing - deserves more care in its delivery. ]
no subject
But this is different. This time... they want to protect her because that's explicitly what they want to do, isn't it?
It's as nice to hear their hopes and dreams as it is overwhelming to know that she's a part of it, just like this.
A tiny sniffle, and she reaches out to rest a hand on their clenched fist.]
I'll be okay! I'm sure of it. I've got you, and I don't think everyone else is really coming after me [two ambushes later this feels untrue], and like... I'm p tough too, ya know?
So I guess if you're gonna worry about me... lemme keep worrying aboutcha until the end. Okay?
[That will make her feel better, just as being protected by Berserker makes her heart feel warm in her chest.]
no subject
It's not because I think you're weak...
[ They'd known from the beginning that Emiri had magical talent — they don't doubt at all that she is, ahem, "p tough." But, this is what they're good at, right? It's what they were made for. Being strong and able to withstand the force of any opponent. At least with her, they can use their power for something good, something they believe in. ]
It's because you're... my... f... fr...
[ FRIEND, THEY'RE TRYING ]
no subject
That's how I feel too. We're friends! Besties, even!
[She has Decided This.]
You've done so much for me even in such a short time, and like... I'm so, so glad all of this time has been spent with you!
[She wouldn't want to be partners with any of the other Servants--this is what feels right, and this is what's made her so happy, despite everything that's happened in this war.]
no subject
They wouldn't want anyone else as their partner, either. ]
Um, earlier, when we were with Rider... it made me think of something. About the time we have left.
[ It's only a matter of time before the war ends, regardless of who the victor is, given their collusion with their allies. And though the words themselves may be ominous, their expression remains uncharacteristically lighter, managing to make eye contact for just a bit longer than normal. ]
no subject
In the end, they can't stay together.
And that's just the way it is.
Emiri isn't a stranger to the fact that sometimes that's how life pans out despite her young age; it isn't anything she's going to fight or rail against. But it does mean her lips pull down into a frown, her shoulders slumping a bit. Still... Berserker must be thinking about something important to bring it up. For once, their expressions are reversed--Berserker's is lighter than normal, even as Emiri can't help but frown.]
Mm...? Like, what's on your mind?
no subject
But they're not a stranger to not getting their way. Actually, that's pretty much the natural order of things, to them. It's sad, of course, seeing how she wilts, and they wilt a little too, biting the inside of their lip. It takes a second, and they look... well, slightly embarrassed, once they're able to utter the words. ]
...It's Crona. My name...
[ Why tell her now? Before, they'd thought telling her would probably only make her sad, were they to lose in the early stages of the competition. But, now... selfishly, they want to be remembered by her than something other than Berserker, or even the beloved nickname she'd bestowed upon them on the first day. If their days are numbered together no matter what, at least they can feel comforted that she'll live on, knowing who they were. ]
I wanted you to know it. Before, um... the war ends.
no subject
She wasn't expecting that at all, and it's clear from the look on her face. She's been curious a few times, of course, but telling people their name was something a Servant might never do, and she could at least understand why.
But this... this is a form of Crona's trust, isn't it?
This is their affection and belief in her in one simple but ever-so-meaningful gesture, and Emiri lights back up like the sun as it sinks in.]
Crona... that's such a nice name!
[And honestly, Emiri nicknames every single person she meets, and it slips out immediately:]
Crororin--
[... But then she shakes her head, expression soft.]
Mm, nah. Crona is perfect. Thank you for telling me... I'm super duper happy right now.
And... I really like your name!
[And she really likes being able to finally use it with them.]
by god i'm going to use this icon once in this game
The smile that breaks out on their face is warmer and brighter for it — unbidden by the tension that their features are typically wrought by. That they trust her completely is clear — they'd never relax this way around anyone else. ]
Um, I'm... happy, too.
[ And they mean that! Even if the delivery is a little shaky. They're still not very accustomed to talking about their own feelings, awkward as a newborn foal at it. But in this moment, they want to convey their heart to her. ]
THEIR PERFECT SMILE
She beams at them in response, and they can be certain that their feelings, their heart--it came across to her loud and clear.
She reaches to squeeze their hands again, grinning.]
Aw, look! You've got such a nice smile, Crona! It's, like, lighting up this whole room to the max!